Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Stop the Nerdfighters! (Parody)

Well, I found some incriminating news of latest reach in the demonic possession of Nerdfighters. Somehow this bizarre Internet cult have take one of fine British Athletes and made her do this incriminating gang sign in the face of this world.

Readers, this bizarre cult has been around the medias, spawning in the BAFTA, British's Got Talent, Fox News, Wall Street Journal, New York Times and now the Olympics.

This Abomination must be stopped. They take out their flesh and blood and turn into aw-e-so-me, which  might have links to hallucinatory drugs. This intellectual loners bury their time watching for symbols in Harry Potter and Star Trek, known for their demonic affiliations.

Along with a gang sign, they have a weird dance ritual, which shows the individual's faith in the cult leaders. They also wear red demonic shirts depicting their cult leader and a strange acronym, PIZZA. Our team of researchers have yet to find a meaning for this phrase, but is assumed to ancient demonic incantation.

They are also known shout this phrase DFTBA as their farewell statement which is purported to mean "Don't For-get to be Aw-e-so-me" which seems to refer to the conversion of flesh and blood to a-we-so-me.

If we're to found these hideous men/women, be prepared to shout Unicorn, their sworn enemy, or say that we're part of Transformer known as the Decepticon. Be sure to be ignorant of such demonic influences, like science, Young Adult literature, or YouTube as these are key gateway to becoming mindless Nerdfighters.

Stay safe. This monsters might be everywhere, hidden in plain sight. Be wary of your friends and family as they might be infected to the horrendous cult of Nerdfighters!

EDIT: We have found that the Nerdfighter gang sign comes from tombs of Jewish Rabbis. Is this lead our theory of Nerdfighter as a Jewish conspiracy threatening to take over the media to a new level? More stories  as we develop.

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